Category Archives: Burnt Bacon

Burnt Bacon: Chycks Who Litter

Not the kind of butt I want to look at.

Some months ago I was walking in down town Fort Collins behind a hot chyck.  I vaguely knew this girl as she works at a place that I drop by now and then.  She has hippie tendencies but does shave … Continue reading

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Burnt Bacon: Ugly Chycks with Big Lips

Jessica Alba Skinny and Tramp Stamped

I’m hanging out here watching Machete by Robert Rodriguez.  It’s a pretty damn kick-ass movie which I’m gonna tell you ya should check out now.  It’s got a metric shit-ton of political commentary and cynicism in it.  My kinda movie.  … Continue reading

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Burnt Bacon: The Shook Twins

What is that wet stuff? Do you think it's safe to touch?

You may be confused by the title if you are up on your Unicorn Butter Women.  Just keep reading. Did you know that on facebook under messages is a subcategory called “other”?  I didn’t.  But then I don’t spend as … Continue reading

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Burnt Bacon: Lil’ Kim

What up everyone – JMAC back on the attack once again. Hope everyone had a solid week. Me? Well, I once again get stuck with the dishes today as it seems someone done went and burnt the shit out of … Continue reading

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Burnt Bacon: Tara Reid

I flew into Newark Airport and was pretty sure we were gonna die.  We arrived early (good thing) and had to take a holding pattern until there was an open runway (bad thing).  The air was turbulent.  Normally I enjoy … Continue reading

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Burnt Bacon: Rihanna

Question: Why isn’t Barbados mentioned in that Beach Boys song where they name-check all of the hot Carribbean islands to “get there fast and then take it slow?” Isn’t that where you wanna go? Especially if it’s an island filled … Continue reading

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Burnt Bacon: Women With Dogs

Can't find a boyfriend? Get a dog.

Yup. Burnt Bacon is being served up late. Why? ‘Cause I left it in the pan way to fucking long.  That’s part of why it’s burnt.  It’s been a busy week for Skippy.  And it’s not gonna slow down any … Continue reading

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Burnt Bacon: Rebecca Black

This edition of Burnt Bacon is a bit different from how the others will be.  Burnt Bacon is suppose to be about women who could be awesome, but screw up instead.  Also Burnt Bacon is suppose to involve some level … Continue reading

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Burnt Bacon: Avril Lavigne

Avril Lavigne. I'd hit that again.

Last night I was a judge for a chilli (or chili) contest.  We had seven chillis to sample and all of them were scrummy in their own way.  Two of them really brought the spice home.  There was the Indian … Continue reading

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Burnt Bacon: Lindsay Lohan

LiLo

Lindsay Lohan is Burnt Bacon The first Burnt Bacon required no thought for me at all.  It’s Lindsay Lohan.  She’s been called a tartlet and a skank and everything else that one calls a woman you wouldn’t take home to … Continue reading

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